i have decided to go to costco and buy a pumpkin pie and eat the entire thing myself.  i havent done it yet. BUT DONT YOU THINK I’LL CHICKEN OUT! I WONT! 

you might think thats disgusting. i would say, yes it is. 

you might say, thats crazy. i would say, youre crazy!

you might say, you’ll gain 200 pounds! i would say, at least i’ll be warm!

you might say, no one wil lever love you again. i would say, why not? there will be more woman to love.

ok fine. what is really going to happen is that i will pay $5.99 for the hugest pumpkin pie on the planet. eat one slice. and then feel really sick. and then see my $5.99 in the garbage an hour later.  and then want more and then go back to costco and pay another $5.99 to do the same thing all over again. 

this is the life of the shmoopios.



do you ever have to pee really bad, but you are

a.too lazy

b.in the middle of something

c.don’t feel like getting up

d. cold

e. other ________________

so you just sit in your chair, continuing to do what you’re doing, crossing and recrossing your legs every few minutes or so until you finally give in and sprint to the bathroom, JUST BARELY making it in time?

yah. me neither…



ahhh toast

yes…it’s been a while. and to celebrate my return why not a blast from the past.
this entry is dedicated to my dear old roommate and hawaiian hula girl: leon*
*name has been hidden to protect the identity of one beth sachiko asano, aka santos.
1:00 AM me: i saw your drunken vegas debauchery
leon: haha..NO
1:01 AM woot woot!!
yeah, no bueno…
not drinking like that again
why are thou up so late?!
me: hehehe
silly santos
i shall sleep now
very sleeepy
leon: w/your leg off the side of your bed?
1:02 AM and the sheet half off
and your glasses still on your head?
oh how i miss thee
1:03 AM me: heheh!
leon: LOL!!!!
me: awww santos!
i miss thee buns
leon: it’s inevitable…you can’t change it
1:04 AM only my buns?!!!
me: yup
1:05 AM fonzie and chachi
leon: i’m fonzie
me: my good friends
your left bun is fonzie
leon: you named them?
me: you didnt?
leon: well…not those names


sitting up at 230 am.

i realize i can’t even recognize the woman ive been for the past few months.  a woman that has been walking around, timid, scared, forgetting the promises of the Lord, withdrawing and drowning in her own insecurity.  but that is not who i am.  it almost makes me sick to think of the thoughts ive had, the things ive said, the way ive acted to the people in my life i care about the most.  but tonight, as i sit, and wait on the Lord, seek His face, fix my eyes on Him, tune my ear to HIm, i realize how blind i have been, and how much i have let the enemy feed me lies.  i dont even know how this happened.  but i will not live like that any longer.  i refuse to let myself be a victim, to hide in shame.   I trust Him with all my of heart. in His perfect love, He shows me what i have looked like to Him, and how it has broken His heart.  and by His grace and power alone, does He lift me out of that and call me to walk, to run, with freedom, with joy, with praise to Him.  I praise Him for He is so good.  My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever. OH BABY! and i thank him for awesome people in my life.  you know who you are. i feel so blessed. 😀


my feets hurt.

smart food

in honor of the nobel prize announcements that will be made this week, i thought i would take this time to blog about my lifelong dream to follow in the footsteps of Andre the Giant and excel in professional wrestling as well as have a career in acting.  wait a minute…what? anyway.  yes it has always been a goal of mine to read a work from each of the Nobel laureates in literature.  that, and keep up to date on who wins for what in each respective catagory, so that i dont waste my time trying to win for something thats already been done.  because i dont know about you, but ever since i was a little girl growing up in the ghettos portland, not knowing when my next meal would be or if i would wake up the next morning with my shoes still on, i knew life was still worth living as long as i kept my eye on that prize.  yep.

so. anyway i started reading One Hundred Years of Solitude by Gabriel Garcia Marquez a while ago, and put it down because there were too many Joses in the book, I couldn’t keep them all straight.  The same thing happened when I read Anna Karenina, but in that case everyones name was like vlademir or the alike. But I’ve picked Marquez back up again, because I remembered that they are going to announce the new laureates this week, and I want to try and at least finish this book before i start drooling over anything else.  I recently finished Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close recommended to me by this wandering fellow, which was quite enjoyable.  i also picked up NT Wright’s Simply Christian, recommended to me by another friend, after about a 3 months hiatus.  on a side note, I’ve found that a nice place to read is in the bathroom.  at my parents house, theres a basket of Men’s Health magazines that i often will read with furrowed eyebrows.  Strangely enough, I get weirded out when I see other people reading in the bathroom.  I’m not sure why…

pray hard.


shmoopios at the store

clerk lady: may i see your id please

shmoopios: sure

shmoopios hands over ID

clerk lady: you’re from ore-gone?

shmoopios: yup.

clerk lady: ddaaa-yammmm. thats far. where is that?

shmoopios: oh you know, somewhere over there.

pray hard.